Don't settle: live the life you want with these 5
steps.
by Reed-Woodard, Marcia A.
SONYA A. LOWERY HAD A GOOD LIFE--BUT SHE WANTED MORE. HER
dissatisfaction prompted her to make pivotal changes in her persona] and
professional life. Three years into her marriage and a budding graphic
design enterprise, she left both her husband and her business partner.
"My life was okay, but I knew I could have more," recalls
Lowery. "I wasn't excited about what I was doing and I was
constantly torn between doing what I wanted and adhering to what others
wanted me to do." Today, 38-year old Lowery is president of
Solaris--House of Fine Graphics, a Greenbelt, Maryland-based design firm
she launched after the split.
"We all have an innate drive to fulfill our desires,"
says Karyn Pettigrew, author of The Invitation: The Secret to Creating
Your Best Life (Highest Good Publications; $6.95). "But we have to
choose whether we want to support that drive or suppress it."
The Chicago-based life coach and business consultant maintains that
those who sup press it suffer in ways that include living with
increasing regrets and experiencing feelings of discontentment, anxiety
and even depression.
"When we settle for less than what we want, we're living
less of the life God intended for us to have and we're
unhappy," Pettigrew says. "However, when we embrace who we are
and pursue what we want, we experience joy, happiness, peace, and
contentment, making it easier to deal with obstacles we encounter in
getting it and move beyond them."
Lowery agrees and recalls that while the divorce and business
closing were difficult, the changes allowed her the freedom to
rediscover her creativity and reignite her childhood passion.
"Creating your best life doesn't necessarily mean making
monumental changes," reminds Pettigrew. She recommends implementing
these small adjustments, which can yield big results:
* Outlook. Rethink your frame of reference or modify your stance.
* Attitude. Establish how you will feel despite the circumstances.
* Response. Determine what response you will exhibit.
CHANGE IS GOOD
[ILLUSTRATION OMITTED]
Pettigrew insists that everyone can create their preferred life.
Here's how:
1 Find your truth. Look deep within your heart and identify what is
important to you. Determine your values, likes, dislikes, and desires.
Lowery realized that she cherished her independence and felt best when
she made decisions on her own terms.
2 Trust yourself. Listen to your intuition. Regardless of what
others think, pursue the life you dream of having. Lowery acknowledges
that despite having fears associated with single parenting and
entrepreneurship, she always believed in her ability to build a business
and take care of her children.
3 Be responsible. Take steps that move you toward your preferred
life. Seek out information. Secure resources. Solicit support. Lowery
took charge of her career aspirations by networking more.
4 Stay focused. Concentrate on what you want and those things that
will allow you to achieve it. Lowery refused to spend time working at
jobs other than those that built her business. "If it wasn't
graphics, I wasn't doing it,--no matter how bad I needed the
money," she recalls.
5 Be intentional. Make deliberate, impactful efforts to further
your progress. Early on, Lowery volunteered to design marketing
materials to gain exposure. She also created opportunities for herself
such as writing a book, The Secret Language of Business Cards (Jordan
Maxwell Publishing; $14.95).
COPYRIGHT 2008 Earl G. Graves Publishing Co.,
Inc. Reproduced with permission of the copyright holder. Further reproduction or distribution is prohibited without permission.
Copyright 2008 Gale, Cengage Learning. All rights
reserved. Gale Group is a Thomson Corporation Company.
NOTE: All illustrations and photos have been removed from this article.