Ask the Relationship Expert: 'Sometimes I'm More Passionate About My Business Than My Partner'

This entrepreneurial pair could work all the time. How do they take time to focus on each other?

Grow Your Business, Not Your Inbox

Stay informed and join our daily newsletter now!
Will be used in accordance with our Privacy Policy
Ask the Relationship Expert: 'Sometimes I'm More Passionate About My Business Than My Partner'
Image credit: Westend61 | Getty Images
Guest Writer
CEO and Founder, Mattenson Coaching & Consulting, Inc.
3 min read
Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.

What happens when running a business gets in the way of your romantic relationship, or vice versa? In this weekly column, relationship expert Marla N. Mattenson responds to entrepreneurs with love dilemmas -- because the hidden power of successful businesses are the stable, loving relationships behind the scenes.

Dear Marla,

My partner and I are both entrepreneurs with very different interests. We both could work all the time, and secretly sometimes the business is the only thing on my brain. We intentionally make time for each other after the kids go to bed, but find it difficult to stop the intensity of focus on our business tasks. How can we do that and connect when we are both so passionate about what we do?

Signed,
In Love With My Business

Dear In Love,

It's wonderful that you're both so passionate about your businesses. My advice might seem contrary to what you'd expect, but I'd like to encourage massive creativity here and suggest that you use the natural passion you both have for your businesses as a jumping off point, as a means to a deeper intimate connection with each other.

Related: Ask the Relationship Expert: 'I Lied to My Girlfriend and She Found Out'

During your time together after the kids go to bed, I suggest that you have an evening debrief on the businesses, where you're talking about what's next, what you are excited about, even what you're nervous about. Whether it's separate businesses or the same business doesn't matter, because it's exciting to talk about what's next when you're feeling positive.

Once your connection is shining and strong, make an intentional shift and say, "Okay, now let's take off our business hats and put them aside, and put on our relationship hats." Then as a way of practicing gratitude and generosity, focus on your love and share three things you love about your partner. It's also fun to have an open-ended visioning session about your relationship. Ask each other, "What vision would you like to build together over the next five to 10 years?"

Related: Ask the Relationship Expert: 'As an Entrepreneur, I Earn Much More Than My Husband -- and It Bothers Him'

This advice applies when there's a natural passion for the business that can be channeled in other areas. If there's a lot of stress in the business around money or something else, do not bring that into the bedroom. You don't want stress around money to be the last thing you talk about before going to bed. You want to create the bedroom as a safe place for positive and powerful connection, which will not only feed the fire of your union, but turn up the heat of your businesses even more.

More from Entrepreneur

Get heaping discounts to books you love delivered straight to your inbox. We’ll feature a different book each week and share exclusive deals you won’t find anywhere else.
Jumpstart Your Business. Entrepreneur Insider is your all-access pass to the skills, experts, and network you need to get your business off the ground—or take it to the next level.
Are you paying too much for business insurance? Do you have critical gaps in your coverage? Trust Entrepreneur to help you find out.

Latest on Entrepreneur

Entrepreneur Media, Inc. values your privacy. In order to understand how people use our site generally, and to create more valuable experiences for you, we may collect data about your use of this site (both directly and through our partners). By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to the use of that data. For more information on our data policies, please visit our Privacy Policy.