This Overlooked Leadership Trait Makes All the Difference in Your Ability to Captivate an Audience You will find, in leadership and in life, that people feel more connected to you and your vision when you ask them to "kick the tires."

As leaders, we desperately want our teams to feel engaged and empowered. We've all had a manager or boss who has all the necessary skills and experiences to lead a team but fails to do the most important aspect of leadership — connect with others.

Fifty-seven percent of American workers say their managers could benefit from training on how to be better people managers, according to a 2020 report from the Society for Human Resource Management. Executive coach and speaker Amy M Chambers has created a strategy to overcome this very real leadership problem.

Chambers believes the secret to becoming a better manager is learning how to involve others more — even in small, gradual ways. "When it comes to strategizing, planning, ideating and decision-making, it's essential that we as leaders involve others at every step of the process," Chambers says.

In one section of her recent book, the 7 V.I.R.T.U.E.S. of Exceptional Leaders, Chambers shares a term that showcases one of the most important aspects of leadership. Here is a snippet from her book, "Invite Others to Kick the Tires," that all leaders should read if their goal is to connect with others:

Back in 1992, my uncle, Mark Chambers, won Toyota's National Salesperson of the Year award. Mark went through several rounds of auditions and competitions showcasing his sales skills, and he finally landed on a national stage in front of several Toyota executives, competing against other finalists in mock role-plays. At stake was a free car and bragging rights.

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My uncle passed away from ALS in 2015, an incredibly sad year for my family. One of the last things we did together was watch the video of Mark's performance in the competition along with the other finalists. The parameters of the competition were fun: Minutes before each finalist went on stage, they were handed a sheet of paper telling them which car they would be "selling" and just one or two pieces of information about the prospective "client." In Mark's case, he would be showing a Toyota Camry — that year's most popular vehicle — to a woman with two small children. That was it.

Mark did an incredible job of immediately engaging the woman in conversation, asking what she was looking for and why. The people playing the roles of the potential buyers weren't making it easy on the finalists, but Mark found out in less than a minute that she was most concerned about safety, given her two small children.

Throughout the presentation, Mark constantly involved the woman in conversation as he carefully observed his 20-minute time limit. Every statement he made about how great the car was, where it ranked in Consumer Reports and how much trunk and back-seat space there was, all aligned with her concerns about her children. Then, Mark did two things on stage I'll never forget.

"This is my favorite part of the presentation!" Mark exclaimed to the woman, in a totally serious but friendly way. "Here, go ahead! Kick the tires."

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"What?" she asked, a confused expression on her face. Mark smiled, again motioning to the tires. "Kick the tires." And so, the woman did. She kicked the tires. "What do you think?" Mark asked her, eagerly leaning in.

"They seem good!" she answered, starting to chuckle. Her chuckle slowly turned to a laugh. And Mark had done it — he'd gotten the first laugh that anyone had gotten on stage.

At the time I watched the tape, I wasn't familiar with the expression, but "kicking the tires" means to inspect something for industry standards or positive characteristics before buying it. In fact, The Chicago Tribune did an interesting backstory on the phrase.

The next thing Mark did was to get the woman inside the car, behind the wheel, to do a multitude of things. She honked the horn, adjusted the seat and looked in the rearview mirror. Of course, in a real-world presentation, this customer no doubt would have test-driven the vehicle.

As I watched the presentation carefully, a distinctive shift in the dialogue and relationship between Mark and this woman occurred. Mark had only met her on stage that day, but I could see their relationship grow and evolve in these two parts of the presentation. Ultimately, I believe it was these moments — and how she responded to him — that earned Mark the win that day. Mark was the only person who involved the prospective buyer this way. He was the only one who asked her to kick the tires and the only one who asked her to get behind the driver's seat and honk the horn. He was the only one to make her laugh. Mark was also the only one who walked away in first place that day.

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Mark involved his potential buyer on that stage. He put her — figuratively and literally — in the driver's seat of that car and the sale. Mark gave her the autonomy to experience the vehicle for herself and to sell the car to herself. Mark knew how important it was that other people be involved in things.

Mark lived his entire life this way. After leaving Toyota of his own accord, he went on to buy and then develop a large commercial real estate property in the Capitol Hill area of downtown Seattle, renting out units to both long-term tenants and short-term guests on vacation. He loved building things. He built his own home in Carnation, Washington; he built a wonderful marriage with his wife (my Aunt Oda); and he built incredible relationships with the 250 or so people who showed up to his memorial service in May 2015.

Perhaps what stuck out the most to me as I observed the incredible legacy Mark left on the world and those who knew him best was that he always involved others in everything he did. Inclusivity was a major theme in his life, and when Mark passed away in his late 50s, he was still incredibly close and connected to the huge circle of friends he had made in college. That whole group stayed close for the four decades following college. Every time I visited Seattle, they were around, enjoying dinners and social gatherings together, helping each other with projects, involved in each other's lives. One married couple in this group even built a little getaway cabin on Mark's property.

Involvement works. Don't go it alone. In everything you do, invite people to kick the tires and get behind the wheel with you.

Related: Want to Sell More? Don't Start With Your Product or Service — Start With Yourself.

You will find, in leadership and in life, that people feel more connected to you and your vision when you ask them to kick the tires, adjust the mirror, honk the horn and take things for a test drive. If you're leading a team, make sure you've got them in the driver's seat most of the time.