Is Comparison Weighing You Down? It's hard not to compare but to fall into the bottomless pitch of comparison and jabbing your persona is certainly avoidable.

By Sania Gupta

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"Jack is more tech-savvier than me!"

"Tim is surely going to get the promotion; he is more experienced than me!"

"She is prettier than me!"

"His posts on Facebook get more likes than mine…"

Aren't these sentences of common parlance? When did you use a similar comparison phrase and weigh yourself down? Maybe a few seconds ago! This tendency to compare and undermine yourself while seeing the other as superior is very common. It is indeed one amongst the most common human tendencies. You tend to see what is better in others and start feeling low without analyzing what's the best in you.

Life is a journey, make it sweet and memorable. But this vicious trap of comparison will make it gruesome and painful. You will eventually stop giving your best and pull your confidence level to its lowest point, thereby, deteriorating your performance. You need to see the best in you and keep motivating your own self. Here a few points you must keep in mind to be your best and come out of the comparison trap:

1. Compare Yourself with Your Own Past

What you were last year or a few years back should be your parameter of comparison and this is the best judge that tells you if you are acing in life and moving in the right direction. Instead of comparing yourself with anyone else, compare and contrast your present vis-à-vis your past and see the level of achievement and performance.

Dhruv Trehan, MD of Shree Ram Plywood Industries, says, "You have to come out of the self-limiting thoughts of comparing your talents with anyone else's. The best scale to compare is what you have been in the past. If you have progressed and the scale seems satisfactory, you are doing well in life."

2. Analyze and Hone your Skill Set

Each morning study and analyze what is your passion, what is that you are best at and enrol yourself for courses to hone the skill sets so that you can ace your field of interest. Each person is unique and is a powerhouse of talent; just that your talents might be in a field different from your colleagues' or friends'. Rather than dwelling on the differences, aim at polishing your niche talents.

Sachin Jain, director at Girnar Global Study Abroad Consultants explains, "Join various online or classroom workshops and intensify your potential. Just scrutinize your passion areas and garnish your talents so that you are never belittled in the comparison trap." Dhruv also emphasizes acuminating your talents and skills.

3. Is Social Media the Cause?

You have to gauge if social media tools like Facebook or Instagram are making you feel low seeing someone else's rosy family pictures or fancy vacation posts or that super awesome (maybe edited using filters) body. If yes, you need to restrict your social media check time as this isn't constructive and is robbing you of your positive energies. Channelize your time in reading something useful and constructive instead.

Vishav Gupta, Director of Bicop International, suggests, "The youth is going astray posting and checking pictures which are taking them away from the realities and constricts their decision-making capacity. To feel good about yourself, utilize time reading or networking rather than seeing what others are doing or portraying to do. Log out from any distractions that let you down."

4. Devise an Improvement Strategy

Try making improvement each day in the spheres you can. Devise an action plan with quantified steps and measurable volume so that you can revise the action plan weekly and see the progress. Assess each week initially and then make monthly schedules. You will be amazed to see the progress if you keep a track of the plan. "Nothing is better than improvising yourself, sitting with the people who motivate you and complimenting others more often", says Sunil Gupta, CEO of Bharat Industrial Corporation. He further adds, "The best way to progress is to frame a goal and a measurable step-by-step action plan to substantiate it."

5. The Takeaway:

It's hard not to compare but to fall into the bottomless pitch of comparison and jabbing your persona is certainly avoidable. Irrespective of the level of competition, focus on your end goals rather than comparing your performance with your colleagues. Give yourself the leverage to focus on the actions and goals. Nurture and pamper yourself and be kind to your own self for your confidence to soar high.

Sania Gupta


Sania Gupta is also Founder and CEO, Digital Kangaroos, an author, entrepreneur, marketer and blogger. And as a career coach at My Study Destination, she has helped thousands of students realize their dreams.

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