Want to Reprogram Your Mind for Handling Adversity? Try These 5 Tips From an Elite Leadership Coach.
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Raul Villacis doesn’t speak like most leadership coaches. The founder of The Next Level Experience, an elite training academy for entrepreneurs, is focused on helping his clients undergo an epic rite of passage — one that has as much to do with the kings and warriors of old as the workaday world.
“Back in the day, if you wanted to be the leader of your tribe, you had to go kill a wolf,” says the Advisor in The Oracles. “They gave you a knife and sent you out into the wilderness, and you’d have to prove yourself worthy. But today, anyone can call themselves a leader.”
As Villacis points out, too many would-be leaders give up at the first sign of struggle and lose the galvanizing edge that made them want to be entrepreneurs in the first place. The trend is so pervasive that it guided Villacis to write “The King’s Code,” a book dedicated to hard-won teachings that have helped his hundreds of entrepreneurial clients get their edge back and build eight-figure businesses.
With the book slated for publication this summer, Villacis gave us a sneak preview of some of its top methods and takeaways. Ready to find your own king’s code? Read on.
1. Don’t fear adversity — seek it out.
For Villacis, the struggle is an integral part of the journey to achieving what he calls “the king’s mindset,” a state of self-possession where you can achieve at the highest level. Too many would-be leaders get stuck in a comfortable state of “good enough,” stagnating when they could be growing, all because they’re afraid of confronting adversity.
“We pretend to be warriors who have it all together. But inside, we’re full of doubt and fear,” says Villacis. “If you look back to tribal times, the guys who went to hunt the wolf didn’t step into adversity’s way because they had to. They did it because they wanted to.”
2. Rethink your habits.
Villacis isn’t a big believer in traditional to-do lists. Instead, he suggests writing a plan for the day that’s based on your long-term goals, including three things you can do to push yourself closer to them. It doesn’t matter if it’s related to your career, your relationship or something else — whatever it is, just write it down.
“This allows you to make little shifts and become more present to what’s important in your life,” says Villacis. “You want to train yourself to crave progress.”
Writing a daily plan is one of seven habits Villacis espouses in his book, including taking care of your mental health and bringing value to others.
3. Question your motivation.
Whenever an important decision is at stake, Villacis suggests asking yourself one simple question: Are you taking action out of a place of fear or expansion? When it’s the former, you’re concentrated on avoiding a particular outcome and risk missing out on crucial growth opportunities.
“Let’s say you don’t want to lose money. You start fixating on it, and all of a sudden you’ve made a decision based on scarcity,” says Villacis. “Instead, look at the opportunities ahead. You might not know what’s going to happen, but you can be certain that you’re learning and being guided. Therefore, you’re going to grow into a better person — even if things don’t work out.”
4. Recognize the power of proximity.
When you spend an extended amount of time with someone, their habits have a way of rubbing off on you. So it’s worth paying attention to the people you surround yourself with day to day, says Villacis — because their presence impacts not only how you think but what you’re able to achieve.
“I believe that if I’m around people who are driven to reach the next level, it’s only a matter of time until I get there myself,” says Villacis. “It’s not just about networking — it’s paying attention to the energy created by the people around you. They have the power to influence you, for better or worse.”
5. Reprogram your mind.
Our social media-driven culture has given many people a grass-is-greener mentality, Villacis says, causing them to envy what they don’t have instead of building it for themselves. He suggests disconnecting from the online noise and practicing a form of active meditation that he details in his book. In doing so, you train your mind to focus on what’s needed to become the person you want to be — instead of being governed by false expectations created by TV and the internet.
“That’s what I’m really talking about in ‘The King’s Code.’ The kingdom is your health, your relationships, your purpose, and your business,” says Villacis. “It’s all about having a foundation. Taking care of your body. Taking care of your connection with a higher power — and your very being. At the end of the day, that’s your mission.”
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